So Sad

My mom called me at 7am this morning begging me to go to a funeral with her this morning. To tell you the truth, I didn't want to go because I didn't want anyone in the public knowing that I even remotely shared the same (no matter how distant) gene pool with this person. "Please" she kept saying, she didn't want to go either, but wanted to show respect to this man's brothers, whom she respected and loved. Okay, so he was trashy and drank his life away and stole his son's wife. Surely this man deserved for me to pay my respects, even if I never laid eyes on him in my life...

Okay, she talked me in to it. We drive up and the parking lot is empty and there are about 10 family members outside, none of which I think had any teeth that I could see. I know that was ugly, but I'm trying to paint the picture here, so bear with me.

Anyhow, we get in the funeral home and I see these people that haven't seen me since I was "knee high to a grass hopper" and even the people who should know me don't.
So, the next people we see are the sheriff and the chief deputy, (the husband's bosses and good friends of ours, btw)- there goes the not seeing anyone we know that can connect us with the deceased....

So the service starts and I am not lyin when I tell you, there were a total of 20 people at this funeral and all of 5 flower arrangements. The preacher had never met him and was called by the funeral home to "say a few words". It was quick and to the point. I just couldn't help but think that this man who lived 60 years on the face of this earth only had 20 people that cared enough to pay their respects, and 10 of those were brothers, daughters, grandkids and an ex-wife- and if you count me, the sheriff and chief (who were basically there to lead the funeral in patrol units for traffic control), this leaves 7 people at this man's funeral. How sad is that?

I just hope I have had more of an effect on people in my 36 years than that. Do you ever wonder if you died, what your funeral would be like, who would be there and what would people say? I am thinking that I need to make sure it is something worthwhile. Something profound. I don't want to leave this world being known as a workaholic and a professional student that didn't have time to live life....

Well, to this man known as Buddy, may you rest in peace and may something you did in life mean something to someone, if only so small...